Many of you don’t know what it’s like to be me. I’m a black woman with acne, body fat, and generalized anxiety disorder. Some days I feel beautiful. Most days I can not take a compliment. Most of the time I feel ugly, fat, and like a failure. I take medication for my anxiety just to get through these times. If I didn’t take it, I wouldn’t be able to get through what I do now. That still doesn’t stop me from burnout, heart pain, acne, feeling worthless, and panic attacks. All of that stuff continues and I have to find ways to continue to function. I’m also dealing with feeling like an outsider in most places, watching people be happy on social media, and wishing that would happen for me. I’m also trying to tackle my demons. I’m triggered easily. All people see is a smile. They see what they feel success and beauty are like. A lot of times all I see is a broken girl who is trying to learn to love herself. And that’s perfectly okay.
Published by This is Tatyana
I am a new blogger, current MSW student, and a special educator. I am also someone who is battling mental health. Through this blog, my hope is to engage others in discussions regarding mental health, systemic racism, Black women and children, and the intersections of social justice and education. View more posts